(Lygenztia *13) Oh, by the way.........

The dreaded intro....almost always from your children. Have you ever heard something like this from your kids?

"Oh, by the way..there's a big, important meeting tonite at the school. It's at 5:30Pm. You have to go.."

(Usually, you have three other things planned and they tell you 5:15)

"Oh, by the way, I need $400 for registration..it's due today by 3:00PM"

(this one, they tell you at 6:45AM..the day before payday)

"Oh, by the way, I need a 1:10 scale model of the Eiffel Tower for my science project. It's due in the morning."

"Oh, by the way, you're friend called and left an important message for you two weeks ago. I forget who it was, or what they wanted."

Why is it that kids can memorize complicated patterns in video games, or learn "when to push the blue button" on X-box, or memorize infinite colour combinations on guitar hero..yet, they cannot remember the most simple, important events in their life or the lives of others? (Usually closely involving a commitment of some kind for their parent.)

But here is the kicker..."Oh by the way....." isn't really last minute, is it? Because they have the memo's, the reminders, the notes, ad infinitum in their school bag/knap sack. But where are those notes? They are smeared with jam, cookie crumbs, juice box stains and pudding cup lids.

So, why dig them out and read them? Gross eh? I think i'll just throw these little suckers out...Mom and Dad probably know about this anyway.

Well, let me tell you something kiddo! These meetings and events are as obscure and secret as a Freemason meeting, if you don't tell us about them..or bring home the damn note. So, let me let you kids in on a little secret. These communications from schools are not secret anagrams from the Davinci Code, these are not the Dead Sea Scrolls, to be hiden and tucked away..they are information that parents need to plan accordingly!

So please, take a moment or two to dig that note out of your knapsack. Wipe off the pudding, bread crumbs and dry out the juice stain. Then give it to your mom or dad.

Now as far as phone messages, that is another Lygenztia.

There are two varieties of message relay from kids to parents:

First, they don't tell you at all.

The message goes something like this...

Caller-"hello, Mr. Smith?

"Kid- "not home, now don't bug me..I'm at level 3 in guitar hero..this is huge..."

"Caller-"we think their bank accounts have been compromised, please have them call us immediately at 1-800-555-1212. this is very urgent"

Kid-"Ya, for sure..I got it..gotta go. My pop tarts are burnin...click"

So...Mom and dad get home..(next conversation)

Mom-"anyone call?"

Kid-"naw...did you buy more pop tarts?"

Second, the delayed message....

The conversation around the dinner table goes something like this...

Dad-"funny, I haven't heard from the Department of Justice about the job offer"

Mom-"oh, you'll get the next one dear"

Kid-"yaaa..somebody called 2 weeks ago..forget their name..said something about the Department, or something. I thought they meant Wal Mart. And they said um, something like if you didn't reply within 24 hours they were going to move to the next coutry...or candidate..something like that. But hey..guess what? I got high score on guitar hero yesterday! It was 13224.6 and I only missed .027 percent of the notes at 1:47PM."

Thanks for your support, Junior. Damn kids.