Ok, there is no clinical term for the phenomenon that I am going to describe, but based on my observations it could be a clinical diagnosis.
Women are funny. So are men, but when women are funny, they are funnier. Get it? hahahahaha..Ok, forget it.
Moving on....
Ever notice how married women, or those in committed relationships react when a "new" woman enters the social domain? It can be dramatic, especially if the "new" woman is attractive.For example, a couple are at a party together..formal function, everyone is looking good and having fun. In walks an unknown, very attractive woman in a low cut revealing dress. Women will instantly go close to their husband and touch them slightly, or at the very least pretend to be interested in them.
It's kinda like staking their claim.
But here is where it gets funny...(at least in my opinion) Laugh if you want, call me an ass if you want..the end result is the same.
Scenario
You and your wife are getting ready for a social function. Inevitbaly, you get impatient and get in an argument, because you feel she is taking too long. Or, she asked you the dreaded question.."does this make me look fat" and you gave what you thought was a funny, "witty" answer. (by the way, no sex for you tonite Casanova)
So, off you go to the social function not uttering one single word to eachother. Both of you staring straight ahead of the car windsheild, radio playing...no conversation. You get there, go your separate ways and engage in separate conversations. That is until, the attractive unknown woman enters....Here is your wife's reaction....she finds you with the speed of a sidewinder jet destroying missile. She grabs your arm, holds on with a great big smile and says something like...."oh dear, you are just so witty..did I tell you that you look so handsome tonite?"
She is holding on to you, like a pissed off lobster lobster clamping onto a newfy fishermans hand.
(5 minutes ago, she thought you were the biggest asshole in the room and that your only chance at sex that night...... was going to be alone, in the shower.)
It's a funny phenomenon, and I know most of the random observers out there have encountered it.
Funny thing is, the reverse is not true.
A couple are at a party together..formal function, everyone is looking good and having fun. In walks an unknown, very handsome man in a striking suit. Men? Hell we don't even notice. We're too busy looking at the food table. (hors dourves for the "refined") If we do meet the guy, we wonder if we have met him before, but aren't terribly concerned about it. We usually forget his name 5 seconds after he walks away, unless he sticks around for a beer or two and talks Hockey. Then, he is worth committing to memory.
Women..well, a tad different. They will want to know EVERYTHING about the "new attractive woman" and will discuss her with their friends. (discreetly)
"is she married?"
"where does she work?"
"does she have kids?"
"is she nice?"
"is she a bitch?"
"do you think they're real?"
They watch how she moves, how she eats, how she drinks, but most especially...how she talks to the other men...always assessing the potential attractive threat.
And a quick note for the guys out there. Take little notice of the "new attractive woman" and DO NOT go out of your way to enter into conversation with her. Or else, your night is going to end very badly.
Or, at the very least...in the shower. Alone.
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